NoChancer Headlines

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

May Day


The media does it’s best to frame contemporary life in terms of a series of wars to fought by screaming heads. According to news outlets the country is currently locked in a blue state/red state battle, which is a ridiculous oversimplification; a relatively small number of people identify themselves as a “red person” or a “blue person” (my apologies to the Blue Man Group and Duke fans).
One of the most relevant examples of such polarization is what CNN has elected to call the “Immigration Battle,” and leading the charge is General Lou Dobbs. I’m not going to get into refuting his arguments; the more important thing issue is this “battle.” I would agree that many immigrants are battling for survival, but no one is taking up arms, yet. Today thousands of people marched through downtown Los Angeles to bring attention to the immigration debate and none of them burned down buildings or attacked police.
Geronimo once said “America is a crazy person,” and that about sums it up. I’d recommend the country get therapy, but Dr. Phil beat me to it. In the 1920s the government began Bracero Programs which bused Mexican workers into America to work in agricultural fields and factories, then the Depression hit and they were rounded up and sent back to Mexico…until World War II came along and the busing began anew…until the soldiers returned from the war and they were once again shipped back. So to summarize here’s our immigration policy: stay in your own country, unless we need you to support the economy, which we do so come on in, on second thought get out, wait I didn’t mean that come back I love you, I hate you, why do you make me hit you, it’s only because I love you so much. That’s right, out immigration policy was created by Ike Turner.
Every morning on the corner of my street a line of men forms and slowly but surely luxury cars pull up and in one or two of them go, off to work on some Beverly Hills lawn for the day. The parallels to prostitution are unavoidable. This isn’t exactly an underground practice, the police could easily crack down, but no one wants that, least of all the undocumented workers. So the cycle of exploitation continues.
What’s the solution? I won’t pretend to know how to solve the problems that arise with ever expanding globalization, but treating the guy who cleans the dishes at your favorite restaurant as a fellow human being and not an enemy combatant in an invisible war is a start. I'm probably preaching to the choir and I don’t usually writepolitical fare, but some annoying little part of my brain (a conscience perhaps?) has been gnawing at me all day because I went to work instead of joining the marches. So this is my tiny contribution/useless attempt to alleviate the guilt, and even though I’m doing my best to ignore the militaristic “Immigration Battle” rhetoric I will say this: Lou Dobbs has a place locked up on my next Hater Nation list. You’ve been warned Lou, you’ve been warned.

I’ll leave the history lesson notes behind next time and get back to what really matters, brain-dead famous people! Can we deport Paris Hilton?

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